Sub-Par Food Service

One of their chicken sandwiches.A buddy and I went to eat at a sub shop over here, because he couldn’t shut up about it. “Oh my God dude you have to try these subs. They’re the best freaking subs ever created.” I was like hell yeah, if they’re the best ever, I sure would hate to miss out on that shit. Give me one of them bitches now! So we went to Jimmy John’s. It’s not a major chain, but who really cares about that? As long as their subs are good, they can be in the running, right? And every time I drive by there, it’s always packed like a can of tuna.

Well here’s my review on the place: I give it one star. Out of five. Why? Well, the bread was good. It was soft and fresh, and very luscious. But the rest of it was like I was eating at home. Nothing special at all. And get this bull ass shit. They don’t have swiss cheese. They have one kind of cheese. One. No pepper jack. No monterey. No cheddar. No provolone. Just American. Or whatever the damn it was they had. One kind. And they only had like two kinds of meat. Okay, I’m done talking about this place. Let’s talk about a good sub shop.

Enter Firehouse Subs. Founded by Firemen. Now that shit was yum. I walked in and couldn’t decide between the ten or so delectable pictures they advertised on the menu. Which is a good sign. If I can’t decide, it all looks good. So I finally step up to the counter and say, “I want the Engineer, please.” The dude says, “Eight inches?” I was like, “Uh, I’m sorry, I don’t really see how that’s relevant. But yeah, uh, well, it’s more like nine and a half.” Then he asks, “White or wheat?” I took off my shades so he could see me a little better. Not sure why I was being discriminated against. I mean, I’m white, so it doesn’t happen terribly often, but it does happen.

Anyway, I got my sub, and let me tell you – that shit was yum. I would highly recommend this place to anyone in the mood for a good warm sub. I eat Quizno’s like once a week, at least. But I’m going to have to start going here at least as often. After having my hopes crushed by the last guy telling me that Jimmy John’s was so good, I have been careful with my trust. But Tony really nailed it this time. I should have known he picked good places. He, after all, introduced me to Sugar Baby’s Barbecue. That place is great, aside from the cockroach infestation. If you want roach beef, that’s your place. Roach Beef. Get it? Ha ha! Ha.

Another place I like to go is In & Out Burger. But they don’t have those here in Texas. I have to wait until I can get out to California or Nevada to get some of that tasty shit. So if you’re in the neighborhood here and looking for a good sub sandwich, make sure you stop by Firehouse Subs, instead of Jimmy John’s. They’re practically next door to each other. And think about it for a minute. What’s a jimmy? And what’s a john? Yeah. See what I mean?

This Post Has 5 Comments

  1. steppy

    I’ve never heard of this place. I guess I’m not missing anything though. Love Firehouse Subs. But, I’ll tell you my favorite sandwich shop is Potbelly Sandwich Works. Yummy.

  2. JD

    I’ve never even heard of either of those places. Dont you live in Dallas, space?

  3. Immigration Officer Tommy Rizzo

    He lives in Mexico City, you fucker. I just deported his ass for being EEE-LEEE-GULL!

Leave a Reply